When God Speaks

My skull is so thick that God has been not whispering in that still small voice, but has been trying frantically and loudly to get my attention.

As I write this, I am reminded of a drive through story I recently heard from a friend. While she was working the drive-through someone pulled up after ordering and paid for the drinks, they then rolled the window up and began a conversation. When she returned she could not get the attention of the driver whose back was to her or the attention of the passenger who was facing her. She was loudly saying "Hello" to a rolled up window, attempting to give them what they had asked for, ordered and paid for. They were there waiting for just what she had to give them, they knew it was coming, they asked for it...but they were so engrossed in themselves and their conversation that they did not hear her calling out to them to give them what they wanted.

As I write this post this story comes to mind, because I feel like I am that couple in the car, and God is standing at the drive through window. He's so perplexed with me and desperately desiring my attention. He knows I want what he has to offer me, I've already asked him for it...but I am not listening as he tries to give me the comfort and the shelter I so desperately desire. I am so engrossed in my own conversation that I can't see him or hear him as he tries to provide what I am so eagerly seeking.

I am at a very low point in my life right now, struggling through several hard circumstances that I have brought myself into. I spent the last week crying more than I can remember crying in a very long time. In one conversation with a dear friend of mine I realized that a large part of the dilemmas I was facing was ME. Does God still speak to us today? Absolutely. He uses the most mind boggling things to do this too. Someone who does not believe He exists turned my attention to Him just the other night. I was distressed that I did not want to discuss the pain I was feeling and his response, "YOU have someone who will listen to you." I felt as if I had been hit upside the head with a large anvil. Of course I did...and why hadn't I given Him the pain and heartache? Beats me...but I'm praying I don't make that mistake again.

The following day I planned to keep myself busy. I was in the car for several hours and instead of dealing with all the cords and gadgets to get my CD player to work, I just listened to the radio. Some friends of mine at one time had a habit of listening to only Christian music on Sundays. It's God's day and they emphasize that by choosing their music on that day to reflect his glory with praise. I have been trying to do the same things. I heard a song on the radio I had never heard before and the words immediately brought me to tears. God was right there...holding out his arms, asking me to trust him.

Here is the song that he gave me...promises to hold me, to comfort me, to shelter me.

Cry On My Shoulder--Overflow

You say you're falling apart
Reached the end of the line
Just looking for your place in an ordinary life
No one calls you friend
No one even knows your name
You just want to feel loved instead of all the pain
You no longer have to say
No one's listening anyway

Come here and cry on my shoulder
I'll hold you 'til its over
I'll rescue you tonight
Let my arms be your shelter
Your hiding place forever
I'll love you more than life

You're wearing a frown
Giving up on hope
My heart is reaching out more than you will ever know
Is your burden too much
Is it more than you can bear
I'll help carry the load if you're willing to share

You have had some hard times
Had thorns placed in your side
I know about what you've been going through
Tears of pain are falling down
It hurts so bad you're crying out
Your problems won't last forever
Let me put you back together

I could hear him calling out to me. I have been crying on shoulders, that is for sure, but not the shoulders who can carry this burden and me with it.

Lord, I'm falling...catch me in your arms of love, grace and forgiveness.