The Art of Letting Go.

You once told me that one of the ways to show my undying devotion to you would be to make a blog post with your name as the title. I wish that this was that post in many ways, but at the same time, the time is not right.

Timing was always against us, and honestly I will never forget you. You taught me how to love....to truly love myself as well as someone else. You taught me that I deserve to be loved. You taught me so many things, you will forever have a place in my life.

I'm not at a place where I can love you right now. You know that. I don't think I will ever find that place and you know that too. I know that you have to let go of me, but selfishly I wish you wouldn't. In the same breath that I ask you to hold on, I say I need you to let go. I have to take care of me and focus on me now. I have to find what kind of person I am going to be as I face these changes and things in my life. You deserve someone who can focus their time and energy on you. You deserve to be loved the way you loved me. *and I did* but we both hurt each other over and over again. That pain is something we didn't deal with well. I ran away; you hid.

So, let go of me. Find someone you can love. Find someone who loves you. Find your joy; your peace; your happiness. You are an amazing man. You will find your happiness. The endless swirl of the downward swimming you are doing can end now. I am cutting the rope. You see, as I read your post, I visioned a large chunk of cement anchored to you. I think I was that cement. Swim up, Eric. Swim up and know I will forever love you...you are a dear friend.